"You think I'm pretty without any makeup on"......NOT?

I like Lady Gaga. Other than her catchy songs I've always thought Gaga was is an original. You know why, because she prefers to be interesting rather than typically pretty. Its like, she's not conveniently different but inconveniently different. Many other stars tried to follow and be outrageous, like Kesha, Rihanna? Epic fail I'd say. The only thing that comes through my vocal cords is the four letter word used to describe ladies with provocative extra curricular activities. Yeah, that's the closest I get to swearing. I wonder if PTA banned that too.

​But this is not about divas and their antics. This is about finding the fine line between being who you are and trying to be who you're not. This newfound quest of being "different". The reason Gaga gets away with her shenanigans is that's who she always was, from day one. Other regular ladies tried too hard to bring something to the exterior that didn't match the interior at all, thus they appear a bit "desperate". And no, not everyone can tell the difference. Also, those who can't wouldn't know what the hell I'm actually talking about.

Back in the day when we were young and without worry life was so simple wasn't it? As in, either you had or or you didn't and everyone lived with such facts. I remember how in A' levels, a welcome or farewell party was all special since everyone was excited to see everyone else all dolled up and suited up, respectively. Save for some, regular school days came with this rough and tough look. Those were the looks we ended up crushing on.

So what's up these days? Mass production? Its like this, the worse the country's situation gets the more extravagant we get with our shopping and choices. To rid self of depression in a time of recession? Vanity in a time of insanity? Every winter it becomes harder to just waltz in the general store with this hoodie inherited from the brother. What was once a sign of warmth, carefree-ness and comfort is now apparently some feminine fashion disaster. Gimme a break.

The sights and sounds around a general marketplace bustling with people, like say Jinnah Super has changed. No more variety of individuals. Its weird, you actually admire someone from afar, girl or guy both but then people like me wonder how much of what you saw was a lie. If a person can make that much effort in hiding all of their flaws what does that say about them? What of those sun kissed faces, unkempt flowing locks, casual careless demure replaced by walking talking Kens and Barbies. Perfect getting boring no? Call me weird but I believe in the slightest of flaws in a person, it kind of makes you see how unflawed the rest of them is. And when I say appearance i mean anything and everything that contributes to an overall outlook. The skin (caked so much that you might be needing a drill), the hair colour, the car, the clothes, the lifestyle, the gadgets, the education, the fake accent, the lavish eating, the stories of non-existent special connections. Everyone is fat these days. And this is not body fat, this is what everyone looks like when they're coated with all that materialistic sheen, real or fake. An epidemic, just like dengue?​​

When the guy sang "you got designer shades just to hide your face" it brings an anecdote to mind. My brother told me how once a group of guys in school followed two girls who came in for admission, all the way to the admin office (very long walk :P) and then came the about turn. Why? Because the girls took off them gigantic shades and the boys weren't actually thrilled. Frankly, that's a bit mean. Stereotyping at its height. It goes on to show how people can like and unlike a whole person like a status update. Where be the simplicity, the sudden rush of feeling, the infatuation, feelings that run skin deep? What is it now, a checklist? Loyalties anyone?

Weirdly, the "checklist" works differently for both sexes now. Most of the female population(take note guys) still goes for the old-fashioned/classy roughed up look rather than glistening hair products. *Points to self*. (And no, that still doesn't give you license to NOT shave orcomb hair for the rest of your days). However, even if you're an original, you're only partially qualified. The female mind is stronger in resisting attraction which is why​ they'd prefer a'package' deal any day. Like my brother once said :"Fine, I admit guys can never be as loyal as girls but girls are crazy for 'dough'".

Its scary right? How do you filter them out? What's real anymore anyway? Believe it or not, humans are weak. They see what they like, they like what they see. End of story. Its just sad that the nation has become even worse about passing judgements. And well we're all part of this. I know the difference. If I barge in a store looking significantly hot with a Fendi hanging on my elbow I am "madam" and if its a quick run, my hair's toussled and messy and I have a shawl wrapped around like an "amma jee" I'm treated like a homeless person until I produce the green or blue bill to get some attention. Did I mention I always end up meeting a gazillion people when adorned by the latter look and get major judgement stares?

Beauty is not in the eye of the beholder anymore. What is it then, our insecurities speaking?Are we THAT bipolar or is it just the result of these trying times we're going through, like there's no other entertainment anymore. There IS no obsession like self obsession right? Or maybe, you think, its not a bad thing to happen at all. If looking or appearing good has been made so easy then why not right? That's what my sis said when I showed her this. She said, so what if its easy and accessible for everyone to look nice these days, if someone thinks they look good with makeup on 24/7 its not actually some sue-able offense. I know she's right but I also know that whatever this is is getting way out of control.

The quest of being different made all of us look the same no? And like a drug we can't get enough of it. I wish that time would come back, when judgement was passed after you actually knew the person, when taking people seriously was not based on how and what they looked like, when people meant what they said and said what they meant, when words were not just words but actions waiting to happen. I wish I was born in the 60s (I say that a lot fyi). Music was good, food was pure, people were transparent and kind of hip too. Oh well.

​Until next time, originally yours,​
Sara Q.

P.S: I HATE winters.

Stop and Stare

This might sound entertaining but honestly what i'm about to discuss here is not short of being an epidemic itself. My dears, I talk about the one and only "STARING" habit which is such an inborn "value" that it sort of accompanies ethnic origin at birth. Face it, WE are a curious nation. We were born wide eyed and even now the existence of the opposite gender never ceases to amaze us. Of course the main problem is girls complaining about the full body scan rather than the other way around. I mean, face it, if a guy catches a girl looking at him intently, with a silly one corner smile he is more likely to puff up his chest than to tug at lose hair strands. BUT there are both sides to a discussion and boys, I will do you justice.

Every Pakistani woman is aware of the fact that when she leaves the house she will be scanned from head to toe by any male individual who frequents her path. If you think its because of wearing something provocative, well think again. I'm not saying thats not a big way to get yourself "hounded" but generally no beauty, height, weight or amount of layers has anything to do with it. And honestly who are we to define provocative; it is too relative. So yes take a walk and start the count; the security guard of the house up front, two teenagers returning from tuition, the regular uncle on a cycle, the guy fixing some phone line, the the shopkeeper, regular suited corporate guy driving down the road, etc. It is like this paranoia that the woman has come to ignore and even accept.

This was a sensitive issue to write on. Though common enough, Miss Q here had to search high and low for answers, talk openly to her male acquaintances as to the reason behind this predicament and observe others all the same being victimised herself. My question, "WHY?". The answer "instinct". The answer took me back to this article I read in the Readers' Digest once about attraction in general. Basically what that article said was, the guy and the girl "size" each other up. Any person, man or woman carries with them this compatibility criteria and when they come across someone who fits that criteria it creates this invisible thread of connection between them. Think about it, if the staring guy's good looking you're not THAT unpleased and well if he's not he's just a shameless loser with no respect for women isn't he? The thing is girls, half of the time you and me don't realise that we give out these signals of approval. I'm not saying such instinct is wrong. It is this instinct that is enabling the population to grow this rapidly.

But look here, there HAS to be something about Pakistan that's different right. What about, say the European countries. Did their hormones get exhausted? Its weird how we claim to be more loyal since most of us stay hitched to the same guy/girl post/pre mid-twenty's age till the time one of the spouses passes away. I get how the single generation scours the market but what I don't get is how every man AND woman doesn't become blurry for a guy/girl when he/she has chosen one to be there forever. It is outrageous, the crimes being done on the name of religion but noone knows the basics OF the religion. I might only be touching "looking" but we all know its an area open for creativity and physicality.

And girls, despite what i said about provocative clothing being a relative term, we all know our cultural limits now don't we. If we exceed those limits we are compelling the male population to to go gaga. Even though speaking from the sisterhood I know how inappropriately some female individuals have come to behave. Like, VERY inappropriate. If the girl deserves to be left alone and not harrassed then the guys deserve less impetus to invoke certain desires. Sometimes I feel its the lack of entertainment that this happens; either its too pricey or too scarce. Of course this somewhat justifies the labour, working class but NOT the "Burger bachay". "Poondi" as the guys like to call it is a social event held at strategic spots usually in large groups. They're easy to spot, mostly at "open" eateries, a bit dressed up, facing the same direction and they usually won't buy anything to eat since they might need to change location at some indefinite time. Then come the "Poondi approvers", girls, mostly young, giggly, basically what the audience is facing and having the silly notion that its because they are so hot/pretty. *sigh*. Oh and they too shall refrain from eating since they consider it a turnoff. What as waste, pass me those fries!

So here i am taking everyone's side. Im so great aren't I? The thing is God created the woman to be loved and respected , not pieced down by body proportions. That's the way it is; the woman needs more respect in this regard than the man because of who and what she is. See, I cannot under any circumstances open my gate at 12 am and walk down to some corner shop 5 minutes away while maybe a guy can. So yeah, just because a woman is apparently admiring someone's bulgy muscles doesnt give the muscle man the same right. (Oh please don't whine, you guys get to do more fun stuff ALREADY). The gist of it is, admire the beauty of the human being, single them out but be DISCREET, or else very soon you lose respect and ultimately credibility. There's admiration and then there's harrasment. Of course the labouror breaking down the road will never read this but maybe some high-ups will and thus serve as an example. Now run off my kids, I pronounce you brothers and sisters. Kidding! :P

Until next time, this is Sara Q thinking of getting some well deserved sleep!